Well it may be almost a week after the event but I have now found time to blog about the FAITH winter conference at the "salt free" school of Stonyhurst. It was excellent, though as with most weekend events no sooner are you there but you are leaving!

We had an an interesting journey there as we used Michelles satnav. as she requested I wont say any more about it but we did make it to the conference... via a garden center! Fr Massie convinced us to turn up really early to help set up but most things were sorted by the time we got there. The confernce was on 'Hearig God's word' and it was nice to collect ourselves with mass before the talk began.

Now, and this is why I am rubbish at apologetics, I was going to write a lovely in depth account of the talks however not only have they merged into one coherent talk in my mind but as I was writing I realised that I was bringing in my own proofs and scripture quotes, when discussing this topic area with people. Therefore I shall not go into it (unless my CDs arrive and I get to hear them again). All in all it was an excellent series of talks on a topic which clearly many people are being questioned on at uni, I certainly have had discussions on this area as I have said. It is nice that young people have the oppertunity to go to the well explained talks by FAITH as in my day there were not even youth groups where I lived and being plunged into the icy waters of university, you have to be very in your speedy reading (which I am not) as you are intsantly asked to prove what you believe and why. Oh how I wish someone had prepared me for that!

The outcome of the talk in brief explained in depth the following, the Bible was passed down orally and was then written. Christ apointed Peter as head of his church and Peter double checked that the correct message was being spread. When it came to picking the books of the bible the spirit-lead autority of the church removed books which clearly were not following Christ teaching but also those books which supported other texts but were not adding any additional insights. The Old Testament introduces us to God and predicts Christs coming, the New Testament reveals the message in the Old and the whole bible should be read focused on Christ, as that was how it is written. The Bible should also be read with a Catechism to hand, as Catholics the we look to the Pope for his guidence on moral areas and clarity of the scriptures, which often we can find in the Catechism. We also looked at if the Bible was historically correct and many arrows point that it is, in fact even now acrcheologist are digging up areas that were quoted to have existed in the bible.

As you can see not only have I not written the tip of the iceberg but there were may other points covered... basically you missed out!

The order of the talks was "The Bible belongs to the Church" by Fr Tim Finigan, "Christ – the Key to understanding the Old Testament" Fr Domonic Rolls, "The Gospels – Historical and true" Fr Whats-his-name and "The Bible in our prayer and in our lives" by Fr Patrick Burke.

Warning: The following information may frighten and disturb the feint of heart. I am about to expose a vast global conspiracy to hide the truth and destroy the world, nay, the universe!

Oh sure, you say. Everybody knows about those. We've all heard of Opus Dei, the Illuminati, 9/11 and the New World Order, the Moon Landing Hoax, Area 51, not to mention the Bishops Conference of England and Wales. Relax. None of that stuff exists.

This is real.

The Proof?

Numerology tells all!

What I am about to tell you is Pure. Hard. Science. Numbers never lie because they are facts. Facts are always true. Numbers are always true.

The Biblical precedent is undeniable. Jesus tells us to forgive 7x7x7 times. In Revelation we hear about the 144000 and everybody has heard about 666. The number of the beast.

The message is clear. Numbers are your friends. Everybody heed the numbers.

So what do the numbers tell us about the Faith Movement?

Everybody knows how it works. A=1, B=2, C=3, D=4, etc, etc. We can calculate the numerological value of a thing like this:

FAITH MOVEMENT
(6+1+9+20+8) + (13+15+22+5+13+5+14+20) = 151

So what? So the Faith Movement = 151. What does it all mean?

SATANIC BUNNIES
(19+1+20+1+14+9+3) + (2+21+14+14+9+5+19) = 151

The Numbers have spoken! For those of you lacking mathematical skills let me explain:

FAITH MOVEMENT = SATANIC BUNNIES

This evidence is indisputable. Remember. Numbers are FACTS.

It gets worse.

As you know (or would, if you were as familiar as with the seedy underbelly of this movement as I am) one of the central tenets of the Satanic Bunnies (Faith Movement) is the Law of Control and Direction. What do the numbers say?

THE LAW OF CONTROL AND DIRECTION
(20+8+5) + (12+1+23) + (15+6) + (3+15+14+20+18+15+12) + (1+14+4) + (4+9+18+5+3+20+9+15+14) = 303

BUNNIES HERETICAL SYNTHESIS
(2+21+14+14+9+5+19) + (8+5+18+5+20+9+3+1+12) + (19+25+14+20+8+5+19+9+19) = 303

THE LAW OF CONTROL AND DIRECTION = BUNNIES HERETICAL SYNTHESIS

I felt my blood chill when I discovered this. It can be no coincidence. Numbers do not lie. The Law of Control and Direction is none other than the Satanic Bunnies Heretical Synthesis.

Synthesis? What's that got to do with anything? You just threw that word in so everything would add up!

Not so. Do not doubt the numbers. They know more than you think.

One of the main texts of the Heretical Bunnies (Faith Movement) is Catholicism: A New Synthesis by Edward Holloway.

What is this "New Synthesis"?

A NEW SYNTHESIS
(1) + (14+5+23) + (19+25+14+20+8+5+19+9+19) = 181

APOSTATE BUNNIES
(1+16+15+19+20+1+20+5) + (2+21+14+14+9+5+19) = 181

A NEW SYNTHESIS = APOSTATE BUNNIES

There is nothing more tragic in our world today than an Apostate Bunny. So cute. So lost. So tragic. Pray for them.

I think we can all agree the Satanic Bunnies must be stopped. The Heretical Synthesis cannot be tolerated. But where to begin? So many members of the Faith Movement are just poor lost Apostate Bunnies. Who is the mastermind behind the mischief?

A well known Faith priest perhaps?

TIM FINIGAN
(20+9+13) + (6+9+14+9+7+1+14) = 102

BUNNY GOD
(2+21+14+14+25) + (7+15+4) = 102

TIM FINIGAN = BUNNY GOD

Holy Hermeneutic Batman!

The Bunny God and his Apostate Bunnies will devour us all!