The other day I mentioned that getting to Osmotherley for the Pilgrimage to Mount Grace depended on me getting stuff done. That wasn't entirely true. What it depended on really was Michelle. Michelle who kindly drove us to Osmotherley. It was heaving it down when Michelle turned up at our house and she kindly humoured us when we insisted on going to Sainsburys for some waterproof clothing for Leona. Waterproof clothes for Babies are very sexist. We ended up buying boy ones because the girl ones seem to be designed on the principle that baby girls don't go out in the rain.

Unfortunately, we neglected to take a map. Our knowledge of the roads in the North Yorkshire Moors is not bad but, well, not good enough. Fortunately the owners manual for Michelle's car had a map showing the location of the various dealerships and we were able to use that map to get as far as Helmsley. After Helmsley, things went a bit wrong. The dealership map only showed major roads and Osmotherley isn't on any major roads. I took my best guess at it's approximate location and got it wrong, not far wrong, but far enough that we ended up driving all the way over the moors and out of the North end to the Stokesley roundabout from where we had to head back on ourselves to get to Osmotherley which was happily signposted from the A19.

Oh well... we arrived in good time and glorious sunshine and had a walk down in to the village where we had the pleasure to use the Toilet of the Year 2004 (they had a certificate on the wall and everything). After that, we sat on a park bench and had sandwiches and watched some chickens. This was an ideal opportunity to try out Leona's brand new wellington boots as the ground was still a little wet after the morning downpour.

After sandwiches we couldn't resist having a cup of tea and slice of cake in Church House. The ladies there had made an overwhelming array of cakes to choose from! I had carrot cake which is my all time favourite cake, Ella had walnut cake and Michelle had some kind of Pavlova. Leona had a bit of everybody's and became better acquainted with a hen. All caked up we set off through the village and stopped off at the Catholic Church, the Church in Osmotherley is interesting because it doesn't look like a Church. It was built at a time when anti-Catholic feeling was running high and there was a need to keep a low profile. From the outside it looks like any other house in the village, you can see in this photo of the interior how the Church is practically hidden in the roof with sash windows to match the rest of the village...

We hoofed it up through the village to the Lady chapel for to say the rosary before Mass, we were just saying hello to Bishop Drainey who always makes an effort to get around and talk to people when we were approached by photographer Mike Morrisey who took our photo with the Bishop for the Catholic Times so now we are famous at last. We also unexpectedly bumped in to our parish priest Fr Massie who is away on holiday. We asked why he was working when he is on holiday and he said "this isn't work, this is pleasure".

It was a lovely sunny day, too sunny perhaps. We sat on our coats on the wet grass and when I put the camera down it steamed up. I put another layer of factor 40 on the babe as mass began. I thought the liturgical setup was a great improvement on the last time, as temporary altars go it was really quite tasteful with wind proof candles and everything. I still don't entirely understand why Bishop Terence hasn't started using the Benedictine Altar Arrangement. I know Pope Benedict hasn't mandated it, but he has set a clear example even using it at the closing mass at World Youth Day in Sydney. Do we generously follow the Pope's example or do we only follow him when he spells it out?

Another complaint... earthenware bowls. Reprobated, therefore, is any practice of using for the celebration of Mass common vessels, or others lacking in quality, or devoid of all artistic merit or which are mere containers, as also other vessels made from glass, earthenware, clay, or other materials that break easily. - Redemptionis Sacramentum 117 I wonder if these are the same earthenware bowls that featured at the Postgate Rally.

The pluses however far outweighed the negative... We actually sang some actual latin. That's right, and nobody died or anything. So it turns out it can be done! And Bishop Terence gave a beautiful and deeply personal homily, I'm going to steal some of it from Bashing Secularism who is a proper journalist and therefore wrote some of it down.

Over the last month I've taken the opportunity to have a break - a holiday. It was an important moment for me because of what happened to me over the last six months. I've not really had the time or the opportunity to reflect and ponder on everything that's happened. The strange thing though is that I began to go through my thoughts and feelings right back to the time when I was asked to be your bishop. The only way I could express them to myself was in terms of a dying, of a grieving and a mourning for something which apparently was being suddenly taken away from me.

I expect it's the fact that the position and life of a bishop is so public and to a certain extent it was the end of me as a private person - and there's a lot of private person within me. It was a genuine process of grieving and mourning. A wave of emotion would cut through me at the most unexpected moments and I could do nothing about it until it had literally taken it's course.

At times like that you need people around you who have experienced something similar who can not only sympathise but can empathise.

I've no doubt that there are people here who are going through periods of grief or mourning. Perhaps someone close has died - a husband, a wife, a family member, a close friend. Perhaps it's another type of grieving over a relationship, a change in your life where you've had to leave something of great value behind you. The last thing you want to hear in these types of situations is 'For goodness sake, pull yourself together. Get on with life.'

Yes there's a time to hear that and a time to respond to it. But we have to mourn, we have to grieve, it's a very basic human thing to do. We literally need a shoulder to cry on, someone to support us and stand by us, someone who has been there, who has passed through that door as well.

..."Mary followed Jesus on the way of the cross. For her it was not a devotional prayer but the reality of her son's final hours on this earth with a painful, shameful death. She knew what grieving and mourning were all about.

..."Refuge in grief, star of the sea pray for the mourner pray for me.

..."At the foot of the cross, Mary was given to us in the person of John as Our Mother too.

..."Where she has gone, we too, by God's grace, should also aspire to go."

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Bishop Drainey exhorted everybody to spread the word about the shrine to Our Lady at Mount Grace and described it as the diocesan shrine to Our Lady. He used her title "Our Lady of Mount Grace" and said that this pilgrimage to Mount Grace is the most important diocesan pilgrimage after Lourdes. I remember he used equally strong language about Nicholas Postgate at the Postgate Rally (he couldn't attend but he sent a letter). He is clearly a man who highly values what he described as "local patrimony" and that's a really good thing.

Leona kicked off a bit during the Eucharistic Prayer so I had to take her to the back where some kind people offered to let us go and sit in the house but Leona was having none of it, she kicked until I put her down on the muddy floor (in her wellies of course) and then she walked all the way through the crowd back to where mummy was sitting.

After the beautiful sunshine it started to rain almost as soon as the mass was ended. We had a cup of tea and a piece of cake in the rain. A lady introduced herself who reads this very blog and knows all about Fr Tim Finigan, Bashing Secularism and ourselves. She told a beautiful story about her husband who having been diagnosed with a terminal illness and only a short time to live was asked if there was anywhere he would like to go. He chose the shrine to our Lady at Mount Grace and so it was on Mount Grace that he spent his last day before he died. It really is a special place to so many people in so many ways.

The rain gave Leona an opportunity to try on her new raincoat and wellies in proper rain. Fr Massie said she didn't look very happy but I think she was loving it. She had that focussed look of a baby really concentrating on experiencing something. Of course, in the photo she looks like she's about to cry but it wasn't like that......

You can decide for yourself whether that constitutes child abuse or an important character building experience. We didn't leave her standing in the rain for very long and when I picked her up she wanted down again but I took her inside anyway. We visited the little shop and looked for children's books but were disappointed. They had a couple of really wordy ones but nothing for Leona aged kiddies, if anybody has any tips for good "I can't read but I like to turn sturdy pages and look at colourful pictures" religious books for toddlers then I'm all ears. We'd like something for her to do in mass but not too distracting.

We bumped in to Jane Cook, the Diocesan Adult Formation Advisor. That was really good because I've found things a little awkward there, I sent her an email earlier this year that caused more bad feeling than I had anticipated (it wasn't supposed to cause any bad feeling, it was just supposed to draw attention to something). I didn't want to fall out with Jane but I was (and still am) hurt by the way Fr John Lumley responded. If I spoke to anybody like that at work I'd be sacked immediately. I now know what people mean when say they were treated as though they were doing something wrong by complaining. I was told I was not being generous and should simply trust my parish priest. My reply to that letter was ignored.

Anyway, I am grateful to Jane because it was she who started speaking to me, something I would have found difficult with the awkwardness I was feeling between us. My thanks to Jane for taking that step. It turns out Osmotherley is her home parish which must be amazing. We left Jane stranded at the top of the mountain, their car was blocked in and they couldn't leave until all the other cars had left. We walked down the hill to the car and Michelle took us home by a far more sensible route of Michelle's design.

Poor Michelle, something went wrong in her car and the battery light came on and the power steering stopped working... she had to keep the engine running for fear the car wouldn't start again and use all her muscles to get the car around roundabouts. She dropped us off without stopping the engine. Thanks again to Michelle for the lift, it was a great day.