There are two kinds of blogs, blogs by important people and blogs by nobodies. We are definitely in the latter category.

People certainly don't read this blog because we are important people, the overwhelming majority of our readers are only here to make sure we aren't talking about them because they labour under the impression that somebody important might be reading. Ha! The rest of you are only here because they enjoy it when I say hurtful things. You beasts!

Anyways, today we got a link from Damian Thompson, it doesn't make us important people, but it's nice to be noticed by somebody who edits a newspaper.

I definitely agree with Damian's suggestion for the offertory: How about an extra gift of sick bags for the congregation? I have to say, I think the comments over there are excellent, here's some of my favourites...

Damian Thompson

As a personal gesture of non-soldarity with this stunt. I have just made a cup of coffee, filling the kettle TO THE VERY BRIM and then pouring the remainder down the sink. May I suggest that Holy Smokers follow my example?

Mystic Mug

I think we should recycle the Bishops.

Shepherds Pie anyone?

joseph

Apart from the horror, for a moment this was hilarious:

"For over-filling our kettles"

I genuinely thought this was a youthfully trendy euphemism for social or sexual excess. I fact I thought it rather good, even if completely out of place in Mass. I was trying to think of all the besetting ways I overfill mine regularly.

Then reading the NYS notes you link to, I see it LITERALLY means for over-filling our kettles.

BEYOND PATHETIC. Bishops, you make me weep. You wouldn't even get a job in a primary school.

Will Touch

Do the Church think their youth don't understand the mass? This is about as in touch with what young Catholics believe, as an aged, pervy, drunk uncle would be, trying to dance with his niece at a family Christmas party.

Full Laudian Frontal

Joseph: I laughed out loud at your wonderful misinterpretation. I can just imagine, in my university days, staggering into lectures in the morning saying "Boy, did I overfill my kettle last night!"

Benedict Carter

This really is the kind of stuff that in healthier times would have induced a planet-saving, resource-saving, marvellously emotion-cleansing bout of violence, the end result would have been no damn lefties, no damn planet-savers and no damn Catholics from the anti-Christ wing of the Church.

Now that's what I call recycling waste.

Richard

I know young folk going through angry far left (and far right) wing phases but none who are taken in by this creepy faux niceness. Who chooses to go to these Youth Sunday jamborees? Why don't they organise Latin Masses for young fogeys like Marcel?! That would be in the spirit of fairness, choice and inclusivity.

Borzoi

Wow. I would really love to know what they were smoking. It must be some pretty amazing stuff.

Raynardine

"As a personal gesture of non-soldarity with this stunt. I have just made a cup of coffee, filling the kettle TO THE VERY BRIM and then pouring the remainder down the sink. May I suggest that Holy Smokers follow my example?"

Well, I over-filled the kettle, made myself some coffee and then poured the remainder down the front of my trousers.

I realise I may have taken this a bit too far.

first things first

Does anyone else think that the Youth Sunday Liturgies advocated by our Bishops appear to be heavily influenced by Cafod?

Mark

The real way to separate this out would be to see whether this LiveSimply campaign also tells the teens to not have premarital sex and to stay away from contraception and homosexuality. All of those things are part of life in the flesh and are not part of life in the spirit.

What's odd about the left is that they preach asceticism when it comes to property and work, but not to personal holiness. It's as if they say that you can be holy if you refuse to drink anything except fair-trade coffee, but that if you're sleeping with whoever you want that's OK.

G. K. Chesterton talked about how people will prize a minor virtue but will ignore a major vice.

Newminster

Do our bishops not understand the extent to which they are being made fools of?

Damian Thompson

The problem is that the Bishops' Conference is trying to force this nonsense on parishes all over the country, so it could happen anywhere there's a trendy, weak or ambitious priest.

I reckon there are several bishops who won't approve of this - they won't have bothered to check it out, and if it's drawn to their attention they'll be unhappy. But will ANY of them speak out? POD, perhaps. The others will keep their heads down, as usual. That's something our bishops excel at.

bernadette

I will never be able to fill my kettle again without sniggering.

There's no way anyone normal will be following any of this advice for the feast of Christ the King. Seriously. With a few million more people on the dole by then, Green Politics will be over. Out of touch yet again.

Live Simply? Most people don`t have a choice actually, you middle-class Chianti-drinking twerps.

Michael Australis

Well, it is breath-taking in its utter banality, let alone its sad & patronising "with it" attitude to "the kids". And for the Feast of Christ the King? Who wants to bet they are going to try and rename it "Christ the Eco-Warrior".

Again, Sociologist rodney Stark's observation that "Religions that ask nothing get nothing" comes to mind. This sort of platitudinous claptrap asks nothing spiritual, intellectual or emotional from its supposed target group. Instead of cahllenging it patronises them, it talks down. It is rubbish.

Kyrie eleison, Christe eleison, Kyrie eleison.

For me, the money quote is this... Do our bishops not understand the extent to which they are being made fools of?

Oh, and I agree with this... I reckon there are several bishops who won't approve of this - they won't have bothered to check it out, and if it's drawn to their attention they'll be unhappy. But will ANY of them speak out? POD, perhaps. The others will keep their heads down, as usual.

Just down the road from here, lived St John Fisher. A Bishop who stood for what was right even when all the Bishops of England stood against him.

We should pray to St John Fisher, because we need a Bishop like him right now.

In the meantime, I'm off to over-fill my kettle...

* snigger *

It's four or five years since Fr John Paul Leonard first came down to Hull to encourage local youth leaders to get together and organise something for National Youth Sunday. Since then, we've had young people in Hull doing everything from decorating candles and playing parachute games, to sitting in groups discussing the scriptures and going to benediction.

This year, for reasons that only Youth Managers can possibly understand, it's been cancelled. There will be no event in Hull. Young people in Hull will need to travel to York. Not because of a lack of volunteers, you understand, we are all here and ready to go, but because the Youth Office has 'decided'.

Meanwhile "joint effort by the livesimply network and the youth ministry community in England and Wales" has produced reclaimthefuture.org.uk.

There is so much wrong with this website, the cowboy website builders they have employed are using tables for layout and Word Documents for simple text downloads - just put it on a web page! The whole reason we have web pages made of HTML instead of Word is that Word doesn't work well on the internet.

Let's start with the Liturgy section. There, we find some fine suggestions for parts of the liturgy...

Penitential Rite

In place of these simple prayers, you could lead the congregation in a more reflective Penitential Rite. For example, highlight the idea that God calls us to wholeness, and to mend a broken world. Use a picture of globe, cut into three pieces, and bring these broken pieces together in a mime, dance or movement as you pray the words, ‘Lord, have mercy…’ and so on.

Or ask a group to think beforehand of some of the ways that we fail to live simply, sustainably or in solidarity with the poor, and name these in a litany of penance. For example:

For the times we’ve wasted energy…
For throwing away unused food…
For turning away from someone in need…
For over filling our kettles…
For wasting paper…
For failing to speak up for the refugee or asylum seeker…
Lord, have mercy.

Note: this would work well musically, too, using a simple refrain.

First Reading

This passage works well as a simple mimed drama or dance. One person can play the role of the shepherd Lord, who stands amongst his sheep. As the passage is read – slowly and strongly – different lines can be dramatised. For example, in the line, ‘I will rescue them from wherever they have been scattered’, ‘sheep’ can wander round in a confused way, using raised hands to symbolise searching in the darkness, with the Lord collecting each one and returning them together.

Movements should be simple but obvious enough to be able to be seen clearly.

You may wish to play some gentle, reflective music in the background.

Another option for illustrating this reading is to scatter the different ‘sheep’ across the congregation. This time, nominated people sit throughout the church or worship space and are brought together by the Shepherd who moves amongst the people. The growing flock of sheep can then be brought to the front of the church for the final lines.

Psalm

Ideally, of course, the psalm should be sung. There are many and varied musical versions based on this well known passage, including:

Because the Lord is my shepherd (Christopher Walker)
God alone may lead… (Tom Conry)
Shepherd me, O God (Marty Haugen)
I’ll sing God’s praises (Aniceto Nazareth)
The King of love my Shepherd is (Henry Williams Baker)

Gospel Reading

It’s another well-known passage of Scripture! This Gospel again lends itself to dramatic presentation and symbolic interpretation. A drama group could bring the Gospel to life, highlighting the different actions mentioned by Jesus, and perhaps even suggesting examples of how these actions are or can be achieved by the parish community. (For example, by holding a recycling clothes event, or arranging a food collection for a local homeless shelter.)

Display the Gospel Slides, based on the illustrations by Ellis Nadler, as the Gospel is proclaimed. (These are available as a PowerPoint file at reclaimthefuture.org.uk)

If you’re feeling really daring, why not challenge the congregation to judge themselves. Ask those that consider themselves to be the sheep of the Gospel to move to the right of the church, and those that are self-confessed goats to be on the left. Then invite both groups to think about how they can put into action the words of Jesus.

After the proclamation of the Gospel, consider presenting the following sketch, which interprets the Last Judgement from the perspective of a television news broadcast.

[I couldn't possibly reproduce the whole sketch here, so I've simply taken the parts with my favourite puns - it is puntastic and you know how I like my puns]

News Reporter: This is the Good News. The headlines at six o’clock. Bong! Feeling sheepish? It’s eternal life for the nation’s favourite animal. Bong! Get your goat up! Gruff news for selfish beasts. Bong! It’s the end of the world as we know it. Which side will you end up on?

Larry: Well, Sue, Jesus certainly wasn’t pulling the wool over our eyes. He didn’t mince his words; he told us quite clearly that we had to do good things for one another.

Larry: Well, they’d flocked to see him – it was so busy you couldn’t see past your own little space. The crowd were pretty divided really. I have to say that some of the goats looked a little sheepish, funnily enough.

Larry: Oh, he was mint. Source of all wisdom, isn’t he? He told them quite plainly that what they failed to do for others they failed to do to him.

Sue: I bet the goats didn’t like that.

Larry: No, Sue, they were baaa-rking mad. Especially when he told them they’d be for the chop.

Preparation of the Gifts

The gifts of bread and wine are presented at the altar: gifts that are used the Gifts in the celebration of the Eucharist. There are many opportunities for enhancing this part of the Mass:

For example, you may wish to present other ‘gifts’ to the Lord, too, representing the life, energy and commitment of young people in the parish.

Gifts that symbolise the Reclaim the Future! theme could be presented. For example: a globe, energy saving lightbulbs, recycling containers, fairly traded goods, pictures of people from different parts of the global community, and so on.

If you have invited the congregation to make livesimply promises or Reclaim the Future! commitment pledges, these could be presented too.

A simple, but highly effective way to present the gifts, is to use dance or movement.

Young people could be invited to ‘dress’ the altar. You could, for example, ask a group to prepare an altar cloth or frontal, based on the livesimply message or the Reclaim the Future! poster. People could also present flowers and candles, as well as the other items that are needed for the Liturgy of the Eucharist.

Next up we have Get Crafty for National Youth Sunday...

Vestments

Have a go at making a vestment for your priest to wear for Mass. A chasuble is very easy to make as it is basically an oval with a hole in it and stole is just two strips of material sewn together.

You can just imagine how impressed all the teenagers will be...

Looking at the photo, I don't feel excluded at all.

Of course, it's one thing to take pot shots at liturgical shenanigans and make fun of priests in silly costumes. It's quite another to deal with the theology of the thing.

Under Going Further you will find a document entitled 'Theology of Sustainability'. This document contains the words 'Gandhi' and 'Ghandi' but not the words 'Christ' or 'Jesus'.

It also references a book 'The Human Story of God' by a chap named Edward Schillebeeckx who has regularly been accused of denying the divinity of Christ.

All of the above is being funded by the Catholic Bishop's Conference of England and Wales. The Bishop of Lancaster recently wrote...

"We have talked too much and done too little. We have witnessed over the past forty years a growing crisis in the Catholic understanding or self-identity of the Church...Have we forgotten what it is to be Catholic?"

Answer is Yes.

The lunatics really are are running the asylum.

This morning Ella and I went unicycling with the husband of Mrs Hall who taught us chemistry and who took the opportunity to make sure we are using tin foil correctly which of course we are. For those of you not blessed with scientific wisdom, you need to put the shiny side on the inside. For those of you now wondering "tin foil has different sides?" you need to get more observant. We unicycled around the Humber Bridge Country Park which is a challenging place to unicycle but we had a great time. It was appropriate, because a couple of years ago we used our unicycles to get to the National Youth Sunday celebrations at St. Vincents. Unicycling and youth events should be connected.

We arrived at the Church hall of Our Lady of Lourdes and St. Peter Chanel (known locally as "Marist" which once hillariously lead some Mormons to think I was telling them I was a Maoist). Micky and Nikki were already there organising things, we had a quick musical practice and very soon people started arriving. I had a brief chat with Richard Marsden and Sarah Holmes before Nicky stood on a chair and got everybody's attention.

As ever, we started with icebreaker games. Micky did a really good job at getting the kids organsied around a parachute and playing a game where they had to learn peoples names to win. He let it run just the right amount of time before quieting the kids down, explaining what was going to happen and then reading the gospel from todays mass which was to be the theme of the day. He was a real master of his art and the kids had fun when it was time to have fun and listened when it was time to listen. The reading, in case you missed mass this morning, was this one...

And the people stood by, watching; but the rulers scoffed at him, saying, "He saved others; let him save himself, if he is the Christ of God, his Chosen One!" The soldiers also mocked him, coming up and offering him vinegar, and saying, "If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!" There was also an inscription over him, "This is the King of the Jews." One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, "Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!" But the other rebuked him, saying, "Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly; for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong." And he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." And he said to him, "Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise."

The kids (sorry, young people) split off in to four groups and each of the groups had two tasks to complete. Here's where it gets really interesting. The first task (provided by the live simply campaign) was to write on a "brick" (A4 Sheet) completing the sentence "I/We promise to live simply by...". We had scarcely sat at our table and the youths had filled in their sheets. "Recycling", "Not Wasting Water", "Turning off my TV and not leaving it on standby". Two things were clear, that they had done this before and that they are sick of it. They filled in the sheets, sighed, and asked what was next. The obvious answer was to draw skulls, knives and guns (for the boys) or flowers and fair trade symbols (for the girls).

So we practically began with the second task. To look at the gospel for the day and another reading. We had to read them, think about them and come up with something to share with the other groups. We got one of the kids to read the gospel again...

And the people stood by, watching; but the rulers scoffed at him, saying, "He saved others; let him save himself, if he is the Christ of God, his Chosen One!" The soldiers also mocked him, coming up and offering him vinegar, and saying, "If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!" There was also an inscription over him, "This is the King of the Jews." One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, "Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!" But the other rebuked him, saying, "Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly; for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong." And he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." And he said to him, "Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise."

Then I asked a question, first I made sure they understood that the reading takes place during the crucifixtion (it's not obvious from the reading) and then I asked "If Jesus is the King of the Universe, why doesn't he get down off the cross, afterall, if he's the King of the Universe surely he can do that sort of thing".

I'm not going to claim they were enthusiastic. They wern't exactly fighting to answer, but their attitude was completely different. This was a question they hadn't all thought about before and the answer wasn't immediately obvious. One of them said "Because he had to die so our sins can be forgiven" and another said "How does dying forgive sins" The lady leading this group with me answered that the whole "how does him dying cause our sins to be forgiven" is one of the mysteries of the Christian faith (which is true). I suggested we take a look at our other reading and see if it gave us any clues...

For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive. But each in his own order: Christ the first fruits, then at his coming those who belong to Christ. Then comes the end, when he delivers the kingdom to God the Father after destroying every rule and every authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death. "For God has put all things in subjection under his feet." But when it says, "All things are put in subjection under him," it is plain that he is excepted who put all things under him. When all things are subjected to him, then the Son himself will also be subjected to him who put all things under him, that God may be everything to every one.

As it was read aloud we reached the line "The last enemy to be destroyed is death" and one lad said "That's in Harry Potter!". Very observant. We also wrangled our way to the answer to the "why doesn't he get down off the cross" question. He had to die to destroy death by rising again. So then another lad says "If Jesus destroyed death why do we still die?". He might as well have said "Checkmate". How do you even begin to answer that question in a way that satisfies him (and older youth) without totally going over the heads of the younger kids. I said something about us not dying because when we die we live forever. It wasn't a good enough answer and he looked dissapointed.

The discussion hadn't been an amazing success but it had acheived something really straightforward, the kids had heard and understood the basic message that Jesus died so our sins can be forgiven and I think for some of them it was the first time they had really thought about that. They spend so long on ethical discussions about recycling.

Fr Stephen Maughan and Canon Micheal Loughlin entered the room about this time and did something that puts them, in my view, a step above all the other priests present. What they did was really simple, they sat down with the kids and talked to them about what they were doing. One of the boys in our group asked Fr Stephen about the readings. Fr Stephen recognised the reading "I preached on this this morning" so the kid asked him about the link to Live Simply "I didn't preach on live simply", replied Fr Stephen, "I preached on Christ the Universal King". Fr Stephen is spot on of course, the obvious message this Sunday is Christ the Universal King, not "Recycle more and don't waste water".

After the group work was over we moved to the Church. The kids all got to light a candle (because that's what participation is all about, right?) and the "bricks" were stuck on the front of the altar. Then each group read out what they had got from the readings. Each group had a different second reading (only we had Harry Potter) so the results were quite different. Then Canon Loughlin exposed the blessed sacrament, some of the kids knelt of their own volition. Huge massive buckets of respect to Fr. John O'Gara who directed proceedings from behind and really made it what it was, which was beautiful. Big respect also to Canon Micheal for not dumbing down on the blessing and also to all the parents and helpers who ran groups. Every group had something good to say, nobody stood up and said "Let's recycle more". Thanks be to God.

After the mass, the kids got their party (also organised by Micky and Nicky - they are legends). The whole event was a great success.

...Who are you and what have you done with James? Where's the criticism? Oh wait, here it is...

What made today a success was the parents and helpers who came along and put in the effort. It would have been nice to see more priests actually hanging around and talking to the young people but I'm sure they have their excuses. These parents and helpers (myself included) are not professional youth workers, we need help and support from the wider Church. What we need are catechetical materials aimed at young people that explain the basics of Chrisitianity in a language secularised teenagers can understand. What we get are leaflets about "living simply" and the importance of recycling.

The problem I think is that Cafod are too good at what they do. Cafod are amazing at taking the message of social justice and living in solidarity with the poor and so they should be. It is their remit. I have nothing but good things to say about Cafod. The problem comes when people use the materials Cafod provide as catechetical materials. Cafod are not setting out to evangelise. The Catholic Youth Services should be. There needs to be a voice as loud as Cafod saying not "recycle and don't waste water" but "here are some reasons to believe God exists..."

Maybe CASE should get involved in youth work? Maybe the Catholic Youth Services should get involed in youth work? Failing that, it would be great if somebody somewhere with the requisite expertise would put together some decent materials and get them out. We need you guys.

Mahatma Gandhi was, I am sure, an amazing man. When it came to religon though, he was somewhat confused. When asked if he was a Hindu he replied "Yes I am. I am also a Christian, a Muslim, a Buddhist and a Jew.". At this point we are supposed to fall over ourselves oohing and aahing at how deep and mystical he is. I find that step decidedly difficult. A man cannot be a Christian, a Muslim, a Buddhist and a Jew. A Jew for goodness sake! Does he have the family tree to prove it?

This year the people at the Catholic Youth Services (I don't want to know how much they cost us each year) have decided, presumably after careful study of the old and new testaments, to go with a quote from Ghandi as the theme for National Youth Sunday (formerly known as the feast of Christ the King).

Drawing inspiration from Mahatma Ghandi ­ the man internationally esteemed for his doctrine of non-violent protest ­ this year's National Youth Sunday 2007 (25 November) will be inviting young adults to 'Be the change you want to see in the world'.

Did you catch that? Be the change you want to see in the world

That's just stupid.

Be the change you want to see. Oh right, at last, now my life has meaning and purpose. Let's think this through for a moment. Apart from the obvious problem that the change I want in the world might differ from the change you want in the world and I might end up writing on a blog while others seethe in a presbytery, there is the second problem, it doesn't work.

Young people want to see many changes in the world. They want an end to terrorism, domestic violence, conflict, crime, global warming, drug abuse, bullying, poverty and racism.

Terrorism? Let me get this straight. Young people want an end to terrorism and the sage-like advice they get from the Catholic Youth Services is "Be the change you want to see in the world". If young people want an end to terrorism then simply not blowing stuff up is not going to do it.

Also, Why is abortion not on that list? Do young people not want to end abortion?

If this is Christianity then screw it...

The world is broken and we have to make it how we want by changing ourselves. That's the message? That's what you want me to give an hour of my life to every Sunday? What's the point?

The fact is that I can't change myself. I am a bad man. This is a fundamental basic teaching of Christianity. No matter how hard I (or you) try to heave ourselves up to perfection we will fail. We've all seen the way it goes, the idealism of youth turns in to the cynicism of old age as people realise they can't build heaven on earth. You can blame the government if you like, you can turn in to a miserable old git and say "if only they had listened". You will be wrong. If only they had listened the world would still be fallen and mankind would still be enslaved by sin. Pretty hopeless huh.

But that is the best the Catholic Youth Services have to offer, the hopelessness of changing myself to change the world. Abandon hope all ye who enter here. I think I'll keep my sunday mornings for myself thanks. I need to enjoy life while I can.

...Christianity is better than that!

Christianity says "yes James, you are screwed". I say "Oh dear" and Christianity says "By the grace of God you will be okay" and I say "Thank God for that!". That's the whole point of the gospel. God freely gives his forgiveness and changes us. If we will let Him, He makes the changes in us that He wants to see in the world.

You can give young people the hopelessness of changing themselves or you can give them the hope of forgiveness. I know which one I would rather have.